The loss of civility ... the loss of maturity ...

Looking at the Highlands page on Facebook reminds me once again why what I originally thought was a great communications tool, I now think is a tool designed for cowards and complainers. Or maybe because it seems people are handling their problems differently these days.- It used to be , particularly with politics and local government issues, the opposing view talked to each other, criticized each other, gave their own opinions and the reasons they were certain they were right, either resolved the issue or agreed to disagree on it, then went on to the other important things in their lives. No more. So many people have gotten so litigious. Highlands on the Facebook page is a perfect example. It doesn’t seem like people want to work together to resolve or compromise. They want to call an attorney, they want to threaten lawsuits, they want to haul matters into court. Why? I volunteer as a mediator. I see how compromise works. I see how people who are so angry with each other they file suits against each actually take the opportunity to talk…not hire lawyers, simply talk to each other….and they find it’s so much cheaper, so much easier, so much more productive, to simply compromise. That way, both sides win a little, lose a little, but both save time, money and aggravation. What’s happened to that kind of thinking? Councilman Jim Murphy in Atlantic Highlands has the right idea. He is suggesting we all just sit back, take a deep breath, and discuss things like adults, with fervor and enthusiasm yes. But with courtesy and a cessation of threats to sue.

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